Haiku Movie Reviews

Time Out

2006-08-14T05:45:00.000-07:00

You are not your job,
Identity can be frail,
A modern conflict.

Secret Things

2006-08-14T05:44:00.000-07:00

Tries to be too much,
A laughable harbinger,
At least there's cute chicks.

Clean

2006-08-14T05:43:00.000-07:00

A lot like Yoko,
Drugs, more drugs, and rock and roll,
Redemption or show?

Kiss Kiss Bang Bang

2006-07-05T10:14:00.000-07:00

Classic pulp fiction,
Narrative device that works,
Self-effacing script.

Syriana

2006-07-05T10:12:00.000-07:00

A complex issue,
Script makes it accessible,
My job's so boring.

The Boys of Baraka

2006-07-05T10:11:00.000-07:00

A concept program,
Help those who truly need it,
Now what will they do?

Running Scared

2006-07-03T15:21:00.000-07:00

Hip script and young cast,
It so wants to be trendy,
Just derivative.

The Three Burials of Melquiades Estrada

2006-07-03T15:20:00.000-07:00

Modern cowboy tale,
About more than just friendship,
Something that defines.

5X2

2006-07-03T15:18:00.000-07:00

Divorce can be tough,
Life occurs in the middle,
Why did they hook up?

Superman Returns

2006-06-29T05:05:00.000-07:00

It's been 20 years,
but, thanks to Bryan Singer,
Superman is back.

Munich

2006-06-16T08:27:00.001-07:00

It asks good questions,
A little heavy handed,
Typical Spielberg.

Along Came Polly

2006-06-16T08:27:00.000-07:00

A silly movie,
Thank god for Alec Baldwin,
Generic ending.

The White Countess

2006-06-12T07:47:00.000-07:00

Romantic movie,
The disabled are sexy,
The female is not.

Shopgirl

2006-06-12T07:45:00.000-07:00

Wrote it for himself,
The other male is vapid,
No character depth.

The Passenger

2006-06-12T07:42:00.000-07:00

Art house reissue,
Hear minimal dialogue,
Watch it try too hard.

Over the Hedge

2006-06-09T14:11:00.000-07:00

Surprisingly good.
Great voice work, good story, and
Safe for the young 'uns.

Infernal Affairs 2

2006-06-09T07:43:00.000-07:00

This prequel was great.
I still prefer the first film,
But this one's quite good.

X-Men 3: The Last Stand

2006-06-09T07:38:00.000-07:00

X2 raised the bar.
This one missed the mark, for sure.
Just wait for Netflix.

Frida

2006-06-09T06:53:00.000-07:00

Painful images,
Amazing use of color,
A real art movie.

Sarah Silverman: Jesus Is Magic

2006-06-09T06:50:00.001-07:00

I really like her,
Which makes this so difficult,
I'm disappointed.

The Boondock Saints

2006-06-09T06:49:00.000-07:00

Those silly Irish,
Always drinking and fighting,
Mediocre flick.

The World

2006-06-07T06:41:00.000-07:00

A unique vision,
Hard working folks with issues,
We all have problems.

The Best of Youth

2006-06-07T06:40:00.000-07:00

Long Italian film,
Tracks the lives of two brothers,
A good six hours.

Warm Water Under a Red Bridge

2006-06-07T06:39:00.000-07:00

She is a geyser,
A unique problem to have,
Dry sense of humor.

The Memory of a Killer

2006-06-05T11:53:00.000-07:00

You won't forget this,
Not your typical killer,
Can he find his keys?

The New World

2006-06-05T11:52:00.000-07:00

John Smith was so hot,
Apparently, Irish, too,
I prefer Batman.

The Family Stone

2006-06-05T11:51:00.000-07:00

Uptight SJP,
A good holiday movie,
Just saw it too late.

Thanks Jennifer!

Groundhog Day

2006-05-16T09:34:00.000-07:00

Deja vu again,
Bill Murray may be a god,
He’s no Adonis.

Nine Queens

2006-05-16T09:33:00.001-07:00

From Argentina,
It’s a classic who-dun-it,
It is worth seeing.

Quicksilver

2006-05-16T09:33:00.000-07:00

Not about Newton,
It is a feel good story,
It’s not worth your time.

Triplets of Belleville

2006-05-15T12:24:00.000-07:00

Pictures are ugly,
Please tell me what's happening!,
Why aren't you talking?

This was submitted by Cathy.

Thanks Cathy!

Overnight

2006-05-15T04:53:00.000-07:00

It’s a great story,
A nobody makes it big,
Watch him lose control.

Brokeback Mountain

2006-05-15T04:52:00.001-07:00

Palpable longing,
A love story with a Twist,
I blame the tight jeans.

In the Realms of the Unreal

2006-05-15T04:52:00.000-07:00

Sure, he wrote a lot,
He even colored pictures,
Does that make it good?

The Big Red One

2006-05-02T05:49:00.000-07:00

A subtle war flick,
It’s a true world war story,
A forgotten film.

The Great Escape

2006-05-02T05:48:00.001-07:00

Classic Steve McQueen,
The ultimate guide to cool,
The whole cast is great.

The Bridge on the River Kwai

2006-05-02T05:48:00.000-07:00

An amazing film,
My favorite war movie,
Whistle while you work.

Roman Holiday

2006-05-01T16:57:00.001-07:00

Beautiful princess,
Sightseeing on a Vespa,
It's a date movie.

Gone With The Wind

2006-05-01T16:57:00.000-07:00

Love Scarlett, at first,
Then realize she's a pain,
Atypical chick.

The Pride of the Yankees

2006-05-01T16:56:00.000-07:00

Black and white sports flick,
An amazing ball player,
Well, before he died.

Phantom of the Opera

2006-04-30T11:39:00.000-07:00

What a waste of time,
I thought it would be better,
Close your eyes and sleep.

Thanks Jennifer!

Deep Impact

2006-04-28T13:40:00.001-07:00

It could not happen,
It is way too fantastic,
A black president?

Finding Forrester

2006-04-28T13:40:00.000-07:00

Reclusive writer,
A young, talented student,
Unoriginal.

Chain Reaction

2006-04-28T13:38:00.000-07:00

Low cost energy,
There is money in oil,
Generic film script.

Junebug

2006-04-26T06:37:00.002-07:00

There is no real depth,
Hit and miss stereotypes,
Could have been better.

I Spy

2006-04-26T06:37:00.001-07:00

Another remake,
It’s pointless to say the least,
Avoid this movie.

The Haunting

2006-04-26T06:37:00.000-07:00

It has a good cast,
Too bad the story is crap,
It had potential.

Thumbsucker

2006-04-24T10:40:00.000-07:00

There are no answers,
That is such a huge relief,
It made me happy.

Little Fish

2006-04-24T10:39:00.000-07:00

Other side of Oz,
Not even one crocodile,
Drugs have a bad side?

What's Love Got To Do With It

2006-04-24T10:37:00.000-07:00

Sassy black lady,
OJ made us forget Ike,
Tina overcame.

Memoirs of a Geisha

2006-04-21T08:26:00.000-07:00

Geisha's are not whores,
Like I thought they would turn out,
Awesome scenery.

This was submitted by Jennifer in Vail, Colorado.

Thanks Jennifer!

Footloose

2006-04-21T05:46:00.000-07:00

Dancing is a sin?
City boy in the country,
He is pure evil.

Quigley Down Under

2006-04-21T05:45:00.001-07:00

Magnum without shorts,
Good old boy way, way out west,
A great cowboy yarn.

Vital

2006-04-21T05:45:00.000-07:00

A faux art import,
Japanese pretentious crap,
Wash your hair instead.

The World According to Garp

2006-04-17T20:47:00.001-07:00

I hate under-toads,
But I like the cross-dresser,
This is not too bad.

Biloxi Blues

2006-04-17T20:47:00.000-07:00

African hot South,
Introduced me to hookers,
A quirky war film.

The Freshman

2006-04-17T20:46:00.000-07:00

It is different,
A tongue in cheek parody,
Not for the masses.

Somewhere in Time

2006-04-14T09:15:00.002-07:00

Made just for women,
Saw it with nine other guys,
What were we thinking?

Memphis Belle

2006-04-14T09:15:00.001-07:00

World War II action,
A good cast of characters,
Generic ending.

The Five Heartbeats

2006-04-14T09:15:00.000-07:00

Great musical scenes,
It is overdramatic,
It's worth a rent, though.

The Rocky Horror Picture Show

2006-04-13T10:27:00.000-07:00

See it at midnight,
Be sure to learn the Time Warp,
Pre-Hedwig cult fave.

Young Frankenstein

2006-04-13T10:26:00.000-07:00

Really funny flick,
I love Puttin’ on the Ritz,
Igor is genius.

The Jerk

2006-04-13T10:24:00.000-07:00

Ground breaking concept,
It could have been offensive,
Instead, it’s greatness.

The Green Mile

2006-04-12T06:17:00.000-07:00

A big ass black guy,
Look at the size of that dude,
Damn, that man is big.

Fried Green Tomatoes

2006-04-12T06:16:00.001-07:00

Funny and touching,
Addresses a lot of themes,
See it with your friends.

Wild At Heart

2006-04-12T06:16:00.000-07:00

A fast paced joy ride,
Creepy cast of characters,
It is fun to watch.

Miller's Crossing

2006-04-11T06:10:00.000-07:00

Old Irish turf war,
It's classic storytelling,
Twists and turns galore.

Black Hawk Down

2006-04-11T06:08:00.000-07:00

Intense battle scenes,
Realistic filmmaking,
A timely lesson.

Lost Highway

2006-04-11T06:04:00.000-07:00

It's a bizarre film,
It is not Lynch's best work,
Try to follow it.

The Thing Called Love

2006-04-10T06:12:00.000-07:00

Country music flick,
It is surprisingly good,
A city of dreams.

The Fifth Element

2006-04-10T06:11:00.001-07:00

Vision of future,
Oldman makes the best villains,
Love it or hate it.

Tears of the Sun

2006-04-10T06:11:00.000-07:00

Navy S.E.A.L. with heart,
Sent to save N.G.O. chick,
Saves himself instead.

Love is the Devil

2006-04-06T12:27:00.000-07:00

Is it love or lust?
Life as dark as his paintings,
Passionate affair.

Happy Together

2006-04-06T12:26:00.000-07:00

We are all the same,
Typical relationship,
They need to move on.

I.Q.

2006-04-06T12:19:00.000-07:00

Why did I see this?
It’s not even close to good,
I am wasting life.

Donnie Darko: Director's Cut

2006-04-05T21:03:00.000-07:00

Donnie Darko, huh?
Well, it was original.
I prefer Harvey

Kiki's Delivery Service

2006-04-05T10:48:00.001-07:00

Making friends is hard,
I prefer the subtitles,
All witches aren’t bad.

Panic Room

2006-04-05T10:48:00.000-07:00

Modern thief’s nightmare,
Is that kid a girl or boy?
A standard ending.

Rear Window

2006-04-05T10:26:00.000-07:00

Typical neighbor,
Snoopy voyeur ruins plans,
Break more than his leg.

Capote

2006-04-04T11:19:00.001-07:00

Cold blooded killers,
Prey upon victims for gain,
So did Capote.

Mean Girls

2006-04-04T11:19:00.000-07:00

High school comedy,
A new girl has to conform,
Morality flick.

The Fugitive

2006-04-04T11:18:00.000-07:00

Murder mystery,
Innocent have things to prove,
A tv remake.

In the Company of Men

2006-04-03T10:30:00.000-07:00

Two immoral guys,
One unsuspecting woman,
Downside of dating.

Head On

2006-04-03T06:16:00.000-07:00

A Turkish delight,
It is about family,
A perfect ending.

Eros

2006-04-03T06:15:00.000-07:00

The first one was great,
The second one was okay,
The third one just sucks.

El Mariachi

2006-03-30T08:57:00.001-08:00

Remake of the first
Was a low budget indie,
Too generic now.

The Village

2006-03-30T08:57:00.000-08:00

A timeless story,
Dark woods are always scary,
You can’t stop progress.

Species

2006-03-30T08:56:00.000-08:00

She’s a man eater,
Her children always come first,
Not the best movie.

Bulworth

2006-03-29T11:05:00.001-08:00

Hot politician,
Chocolate love keeps it real,
An election coup?

The Hand that Rocks the Cradle

2006-03-29T11:05:00.000-08:00

Crazy ass nanny,
She’s in need of attention,
Maybe a Xanax.

Bowfinger

2006-03-29T11:04:00.000-08:00

This is Hollywood,
A parody of the truth,
It’s for insiders.

Grizzly Man

2006-03-28T07:00:00.000-08:00

This dude was crazy,
It was a matter of time,
Can you blame the bears?

Café Lumiere

2006-03-28T06:59:00.001-08:00

Interweaving lives,
Together and all alone,
Distant emotions.

Bob Roberts

2006-03-28T06:59:00.000-08:00

Right wing folk singer,
It was ahead of its time,
Modern politics.

Waiting

2006-03-27T08:03:00.000-08:00

Restaurant comedy,
Never piss off your waiter,
Call Shenanigan's.

Thanks Jennifer!

Assassins

2006-03-27T07:59:00.000-08:00

One guy wants to quit,
Other guy wants the title,
Somebody please die.

The 13th Warrior

2006-03-27T07:58:00.001-08:00

Arab diplomat,
Vikings require his service,
Surprisingly good.

Arlington Road

2006-03-27T07:58:00.000-08:00

Yo, blow me up, dawg,
Oh, that could be in bad taste,
Not in this stinker.

Who Framed Roger Rabbit?

2006-03-24T13:05:00.001-08:00

A modern cartoon,
Maybe a cartoon noir,
Does anyone care?

To Kill a Mockingbird

2006-03-24T13:05:00.000-08:00

First it was a book,
Gregory Peck set the bar,
A classic movie.